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Thank you, Marion for making this so magical. I love you.


Personal story about the project:

I remember coming back home and seeing my father on a black wheel chair. No explanations, nothing ever said about it in the house. 

Naturally, a kid wonders, but my creative thoughts were always calmed down by my parents bright smile and serene words that everything was ok, that it was all just for a temporary back pain. 

Naive as I was, completely busy on being a teenager, growing, experiencing life and dreaming, I didn’t notice what was actually going on inside of my home for two years and what that chair actually meant. 

When I was 14, I had my elementary school graduation trip, and I was so excited. 

We were going from Sao Paulo to the state of Minas Gerais, to spend a week in a campground in nature, with the whole class together.

But before leaving I remember my mom being very tense, insisting that I stay home. She cried and cried begging me to stay, and I thought it was her just being the super protective parent that she’s always been. So I went  anyway, and I had the time of my life, for the first two days. 

Today I understand that the extreme happiness I felt during those two days were a gift from the Universe to prepare me for what would come next. 

It was the third day if I  remember correctly, and I had just won a contest for best costume, I was celebrating outside playing guitar with friends. One of the teachers responsible for us in that trip knew about my passion for music and she knew that I played piano because we were preparing for a talent show together that would happen the week after.. She found a piano in one of the rooms of this campground and was so excited to take me there.. 

She told me we would have to wait until night. I wanted to go and rehearse for the show. I wanted to play, constantly. I was very musically inspired at that time of my life. 

Night comes, she calls me and we started to walk in the direction of the piano room. Right before arriving there, another teacher comes and stops us, saying she needed to talk to me first. She asked me what was wrong with my father, because she heard he was in the hospital..I replied very surprised  “What? He’s in the hospital?! He’s been having some back pain, but my parents said it was nothing serious”. She stays in silence, grabs my hand and takes me to the entrance of the campground.  There I found my grandma and my best friend crying. 

My grandma said we needed to go back to Sao Paulo soon to see my father, that he was in the hospital but he was ok. We had an 8 hour drive ahead. I stayed very calm and slept the whole time. I was positive nothing serious had happen. 

I woke up when we were in front of my house, and I could recognize all those 20 cars parked on my street, that belonged to my family members. At that very moment, I understood everything. I felt everything, no one had to tell me one word. From then on, it feels like my memory completely blacked out and I can’t remember anything. He was gone. My father was gone. His physical body, was gone forever. 

He had been having stomach cancer for two years but they chose not to tell me and my brother, so that we could have normal lives. I never found out, until the day he died.

Villas, this song is for you. I believe this is the song I was meant to play there, at that very room, with that very piano that I never played, at the very moment that you were passing onto another dimension. 

I love you. But the truth is that you never really left me. You continue to teach me so much with your forever present soul. Please dance with me wherever you are right now. I hope you’ll like it.

This experience has really served me as powerful healing ceremony. Each part of the creation process felt like figuring out a piece of an old puzzle. Understanding and accepting why everything went the way it did. And most importantly, trusting everything. 

When you truly, deeply and honestly learn how to trust, life becomes much easier to live. I’m on my path. Thank you for letting me share it with you. 

When you miss someone, may that someone be  on earth or not, just close your eyes and ask that your souls dance together. You will feel the goosebumps, and when you do,  that’s when you’ll understand that nothing is ever really gone and there’s not really any separation between us. 

Stay in peace & love

Ladi Anne